I Don't Know Where to Begin

As a formulaic utterance, "I don't know where to begin" can be a condescending put-down of a comment or proposal that the speaker energetically opposes. [Brenner 2021.1] The meaning conveyed is something like, "This idea is so wrong-headed that we should all just set our hair on fire if it would prevent the organization from adopting this idiotic scheme." When used in this way, as with many formulaic utterances, the speaker gains time to compose what to say next.

Still, the Sometimes we believe we know where to
begin, and we believe we have begun, but that
belief is mistaken. We haven't really begun.experience of not knowing where to begin can be real. Some problems are so resistant to solution, so resistant to understanding, and so tangled up with other problems, that we truly do not know where to begin. And sometimes when we don't know where to begin, we don't even know why we don't know where to begin. Even worse, sometimes we believe we know where to begin, and we believe we have begun, but that belief is mistaken. We haven't really begun.

Here are some of the situations that tend to elicit feelings of I-don't-know-where-to-begin.

Sometimes where we begin doesn't matter

For many efforts, it doesn't matter where we begin. If we begin somewhere, anywhere, we can learn something about the challenge. After a bit of effort, if there's a better place to have begun, that place might become clear. The effort expended to that point might not have solved the problem, but it might have revealed the start of a path to a solution.

This insight suggests a way to resolve the dilemma of having two candidates for places to begin, when neither one seems to present clear advantages over the other. That resolution: try both at once for a short time, then review progress. The review can provide information that makes a choice clear.

The need to know where to begin can be a form of perfectionism

Perfectionism is a personality trait that's associated with seeking flawless results for whatever efforts are underway. With respect to the question of where to begin, perfectionism means finding the perfect place to begin — the place the leads most directly to the desired result. The perfectionist thus focuses more on choice of approach than on progress to the result.

Compare two expenditure scales: the anticipated budget A for solving the problem, and the cost B of deciding how to solve the problem. Include in B the cost of delay in solving the problem. When B/A becomes large enough, perfectionism might be in play.

The debate about where to begin can be a form of political conflict

Discussing where to begin can be a convenient excuse for avoiding the issue altogether. Or it can be a symptom of unresolved political conflict. That is, the where-to-begin discussion might be a form of a deeper conflict that the parties are unwilling to see publicly expressed. The parties to the deeper conflict might be more comfortable engaging in the where-to-begin discussion because it's less likely to reveal the deeper issues.

If where-to-begin discussions erupt with regularity, and if the parties to these discussions repeatedly include the same cast of characters, deeper political conflict is a plausible candidate for the root cause of the pattern. Check for other conflicts. If you find some, resolving them might reduce the incidence of where-to-begin discussions.

Last words

Although formulaic utterances are generally associated with patterns of individual speakers, an organizational analog might also exist. For example, we might consider patterns of conceiving projects, or patterns of solving problems in projects. For solving problems, the where-do-we-begin pattern might consist of expending resources to study alternative approaches, in order to buy time to resolve political conflicts. Things are not always what they seem.  Top    Next Issue

Love the work but not the job? Bad boss, long commute, troubling ethical questions, hateful colleague? This ebook looks at what we can do to get more out of life at work. It helps you get moving again! Read Go For It! Sometimes It's Easier If You Run, filled with tips and techniques for putting zing into your work life. Order Now!

Footnotes

Your comments are welcome

Would you like to see your comments posted here? rbrenjTnUayrCbSnnEcYfner@ChacdcYpBKAaMJgMalFXoCanyon.comSend me your comments by email, or by Web form.

About Point Lookout

Thank you for reading this article. I hope you enjoyed it and found it useful, and that you'll consider recommending it to a friend.

This article in its entirety was written by a human being. No machine intelligence was involved in any way.

Point Lookout is a free weekly email newsletter. Browse the archive of past issues. Subscribe for free.

Support Point Lookout by joining the Friends of Point Lookout, as an individual or as an organization.

Do you face a complex interpersonal situation? Send it in, anonymously if you like, and I'll give you my two cents.

Related articles

More articles on Problem Solving and Creativity:

Problem Defining and Problem Solving

Sometimes problem-solving sessions are difficult because we get started solving a problem before we know what problem we're solving. Understanding the connection between stakeholders, problem solving, and problem defining can reduce conflict and produce better solutions.

Forward Backtracking

The nastiest part about solving complex problems isn't their complexity. It's the feeling of being overwhelmed when we realize we haven't a clue about how to get from where we are to where we need to be. Here's one way to get a clue.

How to Reject Expert Opinion: II

When groups of decision makers confront complex problems, and they receive opinions from recognized experts, those opinions sometimes conflict with the group's own preferences. What tactics do groups use to reject the opinions of people with relevant expertise?

The Trap of Beautiful Language

As we assess the validity of others' statements, we risk making a characteristically human error — we confuse the beauty of their language with the reliability of its meaning. We're easily thrown off by alliteration, anaphora, epistrophe, and chiasmus.

Contrary Indicators of Psychological Safety: I

To take the risks that learning and practicing new ways require, we all need a sense that trial-and-error approaches are safe. Organizations seeking to improve processes would do well to begin by assessing their level of psychological safety.

See also Problem Solving and Creativity and Problem Solving and Creativity for more related articles.

Forthcoming issues of Point Lookout

Coming January 22: Storming: Obstacle or Pathway?

The Storming stage of Tuckman's model of small group development is widely misunderstood. Fighting the storms, denying they exist, or bypassing them doesn't work. Letting them blow themselves out in a somewhat-controlled manner is the path to Norming and Performing. Available here and by RSS on January 22.

And on January 29: A Framework for Safe Storming

The Storming stage of Tuckman's development sequence for small groups is when the group explores its frustrations and degrees of disagreement about both structure and task. Only by understanding these misalignments is reaching alignment possible. Here is a framework for this exploration. Available here and by RSS on January 29.

Coaching services

I offer email and telephone coaching at both corporate and individual rates. Contact Rick for details at rbrenjTnUayrCbSnnEcYfner@ChacdcYpBKAaMJgMalFXoCanyon.com or (650) 787-6475, or toll-free in the continental US at (866) 378-5470.

Get the ebook!

Past issues of Point Lookout are available in six ebooks:

• Get 2001-2 in Geese Don't Land on Twigs (PDF, )
• Get 2003-4 in Why Dogs Wag (PDF, )
• Get 2005-6 in Loopy Things We Do (PDF, )
• Get 2007-8 in Things We Believe That Maybe Aren't So True (PDF, )
• Get 2009-10 in The Questions Not Asked (PDF, )
• Get all of the first twelve years (2001-2012) in The Collected Issues of Point Lookout (PDF, )

Are you a writer, editor or publisher on deadline? Are you looking for an article that will get people talking and get compliments flying your way? You can have 500-1000 words in your inbox in one hour. License any article from this Web site. More info